Grumps and Rules

A friend posted the other day that she wished she was more of a Tigger and less of an Eeyore. I have to agree that unfortunately I have more of an Eeyore personality as well. My hubbs teases me when I'm glass-half-empty by saying, in his Eeyore voice, 'it probably doesn't even matter'. I'm not sure why I am this way. My family was very positive and affirming growing up, I have a great life and know that I am a beloved child of God. But often, I am a grump.

Last night I was waiting in line at the Salvation Army. I had been waiting several minutes in line watching two cashiers slowly tally up the cartloads full of plates, knick-knacks and clothes. I had two things. A middle aged/older lady comes behind me and asks if I'm next in line. I say yes. She then asks if I mind if she goes in front of me. Now usually I have a tender spot for older people, but not this time. There was no explanation, just an implied sense that I should let her go ahead. So I said 'yes I do mind'. And then alternated feeling bad and stewing the rest of the time. I had already been waiting and only had 2 items, she just got there and expected to go right to the counter? Sorry lady, not today. It was more her entitlement attitude that bugged me, why is she above lines? And how does one attain such status?

Anyway, in other news, Andrew and I are fast approaching our 1 year anniversary. The other day I teased him that we should for the next year not say 'babe' and instead use only our names. I was mostly teasing, but in some ways it would be kind of nice. Once I heard that the most beautiful word a person can hear is their own name. Sometimes I go weeks without hearing my name from Andrew, not that I don't like being his 'babe' or 'baby' but I like being me too.

The potential drawback of this rule would be that my fear of calling him the wrong name would be back in full force. I've only done this once, and I don't think he even noticed, but I live in fear of this. Talking about this subject reminds me of one very unfortunate ex-bf who I did this all the time to. Most frequently I called him 'dad' which he often didn't even notice since his name was 'Dan'. But over the year or so I called him almost every name in my family. Most humiliatingly- 'Harmony' which was the name of our dog, and once, 'grandma'. Yes, that happened. I do have a kind of scatterbrain/early alzheimer's way with words, and usually I'd be getting ready to tell him something about said person, so I think that was why, but I do not want this to happen again!

So maybe we'll just keep doing what we're doing with our marriage, it seems to be working so far! ;)