July goings on - and Grandpa's passing

 Little lady made herself a place to be cozy and watch tv from around the corner

Grew enough green beans for a family dinner's worth!

I got the soap in the background, but it smelled bad. And I'm all like "life is too short for bad smelling soap!" .... but then I'm yet too cheap to throw it out... :P

My cousin got married, so we did a quick weekend in Chicago. Got to see the Bean!

Speaking of beans...

One day I had a beautiful lush green flowering bean plant starting to climb up the trellis enterance into my garden, and then next morning...

Noooooo!!!!! I don't know if it was deer, almost every leaf was delicately devoured. I was so sad.

Last night Doug set up a "fence" of fishing line. The idea is the deer bump into the line, but since they can't see anything, they get nervous and go away. It has worked in the past. 

But this morning...

Several Zinnia heads and leaves were gone. Like 20 plants. So maybe still deer, or maybe rabbits. Who knows. But I was very very sad. 

Nothing has made it into my garden actually, but I had these flowers all around the perimeter for beauty and to attract pollinators, so it has been very frustrating to see all your hard work just chewed away overnight. 

The by far biggest sadness was the passing of my Grandpa Ken. He was my last Grandparent. I had the opportunity to live with him (and Grandma Marie) on/off/on about a decade while I was going to the University near their home. I had a busy social life at the time, and I'm sure part of it was just me being selfish, and I have a regret of not using more of my time to invest in actually spending quality time with them during that period. 

Over this last decade of being married and having kids we were able to spend time with him, probably every year, after he moved up North (after my Grandma's fall, and worsening dementia took them to live with my doctor uncle). And these photos and video clips are of that time. 

My grandpa was 103, my grandma has been gone for 6 years now, and I know he was feeling ready to go to heaven for a long time. Sometimes he would joke "your uncle won't let me die!" We are so blessed, as a family, to have had him around so long. It has been amazing to see the sacrificial love from my uncle and his wife for caring for them/him  for so long, And I am thankful he passed peacefully, knowing he was going "on his journey" to heaven, and at his last breath his son was there reading the passage where Mary Magdalene came to find the tomb empty. Who could ask for a better passing. I am thankful. But he was very loved, and will be very missed. 

I had the chance to facetime call him when I was at work last week. He couldn't hear me, but my uncle said "it's your granddaughter Anne Marie saying she loves you" and he answered out "and I love her!" and again I'm just so thankful that his last years have been happy and full of love and, for the most part, peace. When we were kids it seemed we were always in his way and he seemed grumpy, so it's been really wonderful to enjoy this other side of him as the lasting memory. 

Oh the peace that comes from knowing that someday I will see him again. 

Until then, Grandpa I love you.

102

My Grandpa turned 102 today. Here he is with a cake my cousin made for him, he's so cute. 

He is my last grandparent. 

Today we were in the city where he used to live before my Grandma broke her hip and they had to leave their home with its upstairs bedroom and move up North to live with one of my uncles. So I wanted to stop by their house, and maybe send Grandpa a pic on his birthday. 

As we were driving down the street I was commenting to Doug about how few original homes remained as the homes were being torn down for these mansions on the small, but wonderful close to downtown, lots. 

And then we pulled up....

It was gone.

And I got out and stood by that fence and just started sobbing. 

I'm not even sure why. 

It's just a house and they haven't even been there for nearly 10 years now. For a now mostly wealthy area, it was a small house built in 1901, and I kept thinking one of these days when I'd drive by this is what I'd find, but I was shocked all the same. 

My grandparents bought the house a few years after they married, they raised 8 kids in that house, my grandpa built an addition on the back, I lived there a good almost 10 years on and off as I watched it for them when they went to Florida for the winters and as I went to school and figured out life. So many fun memories of racing down the streets with my cousins and playing in the backyard. It seemed so huge back then, and looks so teeny now with the trees ripped out and the house gone. So many family dinners around the dinner table and people crammed into the living rooms. Parties at "grandma's house" in my college years. So so many good memories.

I think I felt extra sad because now I don't have either of my grandparents' homes to look at anymore. My mom's side my grandparents' home burnt down in a fire, with my Grandpa Arthur inside. 

And now this one is gone too. And Grandpa is my last grandparent, I'm lucky to have had him this long, I know. Doug said to me, he hasn't had any grandparents in over a decade now. 

Anyway, I was just feeling sad. I know I must have a picture of it somewhere, but for now all I have is this one off zillow where you can see they haven't powerwashed it in forever, and after 100+ years the front steps were now starting to slant, I don't know what those people did to it to let it fall into such disrepair. My grandpa always took such good care of it. 

Anyway, just feeling sad. Missing my Grandma who's been gone 5(?) years already, but feels like much longer since she battled Alzheimer's for a long time. Life feels very bittersweet sometimes. 

I need to make a plan to go visit him again. We went up last October for a quick visit and I love seeing my kids spend time with him. August was so excited to teach him to use his Nerf gun. He can almost relate better to him, I find myself struggling to know what to talk about with the age-related memory loss and he can't really follow a conversation much anymore. But I still love to see him and just like to be there. 

Happy birthday Grandpa. 

I know he longs to be in heaven with Jesus and my grandma, so I hope someday soon he will, but I also think it's so neat he's still here.